So What If I Got Clifford The Big Red Dog Drunk?

This weekend we were sent Clifford, the Big Red Dog, along with a beautifully laminated journal containing an entry from each of the class members he spent weekends with in the past. Each page was beautifully written, typed, or hand calligraphied. All were accompanied by a montage of pictures showing the quality time each child and their family spent with Clifford. Clifford attended dinners, parties, one family even took him to the dog park…alone. Either I have the craftiest mothers in my class, or these ladies are truly hard-up for companionship.

Ryan’s teacher: I am sorry Jenny; I was unable to accept your pages for Clifford’s journal, as there were a few problems. You wrote that he “passed-out” from too much beer and wings while watching the Super Bowl with you and your husband. I don’t know if you are aware that we read these Clifford journals to the class first thing Monday morning.

Crappy Mom, AKA Me: I was not aware of that.

Ryan’s Teacher: I doubt Ryan would appreciate me reiterating how Clifford spent Friday and Saturday as you put it, “ …in his sack, suffocating.” Or that you “…found him sad, lonely, and dehydrated Sunday evening.” I would send him home with you for another weekend, but I fear for his health in your hands, not to mention his sobriety.

Crappy Mom, AKA Me: His sobriety? Had I known was battling alcoholism, I never would have played the drinking game where you chug every time someone scores. In my defense, it was T-Bone’s idea.

13 thoughts on “So What If I Got Clifford The Big Red Dog Drunk?

  1. Cherie

    Again, a very delightful scenario. I hope Tanner doesn’t receive the same care as Clifford. Poor Clifford, I just want to know how big he got drinking all those shots, by the way did he happen to turn “BLUE”.

  2. Denee King

    I would never invite Clifford over again – a good friend covers for you…especially when fun is involved. Clifford is Red which must mean he was an Arizona fan so what else did they expect the little guy to do? Those teachers obviously aren’t football fans and so if you want to help them I might advise sending them a copy of this: yeah, that’s right…you have to copy/paste…deal with it! 🙂

  3. Brian

    That is funny. We also had Clifford for a week from Zach’s kindergarten class. We only made him smoke crack though. I guess you know nothing about that drug.

  4. Pingback: Anonymous

  5. Pingback: My Son was the Featured Student and I’m Pretty Pissed about it | The Suburban Jungle

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge