Here are the Top Reasons Not to ‘Friend’ Your In-Laws/Parents on FB or Let Them Read Your Blog (both of which I’m totally guilty of):
You may regrettably hear this:
1. “We tried that new position you mentioned and I have just one question…”
2. “Is everything ok with money? Your post about coupons/discount codes/the economy/stealing shampoos from hotel carts/insert penny pinching tip here… has left us concerned.”
3. “Have you ever thought about couples therapy? We found some of your post titles rather worrisome, like: I Cheated on my Husband with Christian Grey/ Sex or Oven Cleaning/ Husband For Sale: Motivated Seller, Why is My Hubby Such a Wuss When He’s Sick? …”
(Don’t judge fellow bloggers, I’m sure you have some doozies of your own.)
“And let’s not forget about that fight when you threw oyster crackers/hand-sanitizer/the remote/insert throwable item here… at your husband/our child and found it funny enough to write about. We did not laugh.”
4. “Have you considered hiring a nanny? You mentioned in that post about how Mothers can’t do it all, that you must remember to expose the kids to sunlight, and water them daily. We worry that you’re confused.”
5. “Do you think you might be going color blind? We saw some pics on Instagram where the kids are looking a bit well, kindly put, Punky Brewster-esque. And your caption did not seem to reflect concern. Wait, is it the money again? We’d be happy to buy them matching socks… and shoes.”
It opens the door to unwanted discussions:
6. After you mention/write a post about Fifty Shades (no matter your stance), your mother and MIL will take that as fair game to discuss their thoughts on Christian Grey, sex toys, master/submissive relationships, and comparisons to their own sex lives (past and present).
You may hear something like this, I did: “I bet I lot of people thought those books were really dirty, but I was exposed to too much porn as VP of a video store chain, to be surprised.” Said my mom, gag, gag.
7. Due to content of your blog or update, you may be forced to broach a topic with a parent or in law that has a distinct before and after line. Like, now that you’ve written about vibrators and your family has commented on it, you can never go back to a time before that happened.
But, you’ll wish you could, because times were so much simpler then.
And the top reason to never social network with said peeps:
8. If your spouse ever goes missing… your in laws, and much of your family, will be quite sure you had something to do with it. Well, your family may take your side, because they love you, but they’ll still ask to check your trunk.
PS – I found this agreement/warning/rules of engagement post for my in laws. It was written 6 months after the inception of The Suburban Jungle, as I was concerned about what they may infer from reading my blog. Years later, they have cleared ripped up said agreement!
But, I still love you guys!
Jenny From the Blog
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